OPEN LETTER TO NIGERIAN LEADERS

OPEN LETTER TO NIGERIAN LEADERS by David King (a satirical poem)


1. Dear Nigerian Leaders,
this is a candid letter to all of you whom we have either voted for or have been forced on us by the leaders we elected.

2. Whatever title you might be carrying, be it President, Vice President, Senate President, Deputy Senate President, Speaker, Deputy Speaker, Governor, Deputy Governor, Minister, Commissioner, Ambassador, High Commissioner, SA, PA or whatever, please see to it that we don't all die off before we the youth of Nigeria start enjoying the dividends of democracy.
3. I have chosen this medium to address you because we are in the era of open letters, e.g. open letter from Obasanjo to Jonathan, open letter from Iyabo Obasanjo to Olusegun Obasanjo, open letter from Chief Edwin Clarke to Chief Obasanjo, etc, etc.
4. Since the advent of democracy in Nigeria in 1999 and even since before then, you people have been referring to we the youth as the leaders of tomorrow, but up till now na siddon look we still dey do while you people are recycling yourselves in different positions.
5. How can we explain that the youth leaders of the various political parties at one time or the other were above the age of 60. The UN defines a youth as “a period of transition from the dependence of childhood to adulthood’s independence and awareness. It can be based for instance on the definition given in the African Youth Charter where “youth” means “every person between the ages of 15 and 35 years”. So why are 60-year-olds being named as Youth Leaders in Nigeria? Yeye wan begin dey smell abi? God dey sha!
6. Hey, Oga Leader, why is it that our teachers are poorly paid but our leaders are handsomely remunerated? Primary school teachers are frolicking with abject poverty and wallowing in stupendous penury while their products are stinking rich. Haba Oga Leader, please try a little more for our teachers na. Do you want our teachers to turn to petty trading and neglect the pupils? Al of them will become like Akpors. Don't let our University and polytechnic lecturers embark on needless strikes that will set the educational development of our students back. Ok just check out this, many female students who returned to school after the last ASUU strike came back with pregnancies. Some of the boys decided to abandon school and learn a trade. Some died. Many got married. And many have even forgoteen what they had learned before the strike. Hia!
7. Dearest Nigerian Leaders, when you were campaigning you promised us heaven and earth. You promised free education, free water, free housing, free wives and free husbands, etc. But soon after you are elected you will make Abuja or your state capital your permanent home. You will change your sim cards and hire many personal assistants to keep people away from you. Its not fair oo. Some of you will go to the National Assembly and be shouting nay and aye without making any meaning contributing throughout the four years. Some will be buying bulletproof cars and marrying new wives.
8. I know some of you are seriously trying, but that is not enough.
9. We the youth of this country believe seriously in you and some of us even go out of way to ensure you win your elections, but time after time we are disappointed by your actions immediately you are sworn in. It is always the youth that are killed in election violence. It is the youth that are used to conduct the election. It is the youth that are used by the politicians to ensure victory at all cost. But at the end of the day the youth will be effectively left out when the spoils of the office are being shared. Haba!
10. The Holy Book tells us to pray for our leaders and we have been praying ever since but the situation is still standing kamkpe, no shaking. The rich are getting richer while the poor are getting poorer.
11. Oga Leader, we the youth cannot even marry confidently anymore because our future wives have been spoiled by the money of these so-called big men. How will my future wife respect me when I'm buying her recharge cards while one big aristo is buying her iPhone and Blackberry handsets. I will buy her weave-on and he will open saloon for her. I will give her money for keke NAPEP and he will buy her tear-nylon brand new car. I will offer to take her to the nearby mama-put and he will give her return ticket to Dubai for shopping. Chai!
12. Dear Leaders, I know that insurgencies and incessant industrial actions by various trade unions are seriously acting as stumbling blocks to you and your plans for my dear Nigeria, but at least let us see your effort and we will appreciate it even if it is not adequate.
13. Fix electricity for us and we will gainfully employ ourselves because we know the government cannot fully employ all of us. Our girls will go into hairdressing, tailoring, and other ventures while our boys will go in barbing, graphic designing, music, and so on, but there must be light, if not, we will keep using all our profits to buy fuel to power our I-pass-my-neighbor generators, and at the end of the day we will only be working for the importers and retailers of petrol.
14. If there is stable electricity, we will use our talents to feed ourselves instead of craving to join the military, police and paramilitary agencies. The rate at which all the youth of this country are joining the paramilitary these days, everyone in this country will soon be wearing one uniform or the other. But many of them are not joining because they like the paramilitary, its just because there's nothing else to do to earn a decent living.
15. The only activities that are helping the youth escape poverty now are music, comedy and football. If not, how will Okocha, Kanu, Mikel, Martins, Keshi, Ahmed Musa, Ogenyi Onazi, and others have escaped poverty? Psquare, Ice Prince, Basket Mouth, Gandoki, Kafee and people like Wande Coal escaped poverty through music, comedy and dance. I know that they sometimes pass immoral messages in their music but unfortunately that is what people are willing to pay for. The government is doing enough to develop football but not much is being done for the entertainment industry.
16. Because of these developments, people that have two left legs now want to play football. People with croaky frog voices are singing, dry people are cracking drab jokes, and every unemployed youth wants to become a deejay. They said afterall all you need is a laptop and virtual dj software, and you can download the latest songs from the web, grow dreadlocks on your head and you have become a DJ. But we can't blame them because everyone has declared war on poverty.
17. My dear Leaders, our roads are bad, and instead of the authorities to concentrate on rehabilitating the roads, the road safety people are keenly interested in introducing new number plates.
18. Instead of strengthening the Police Force, new paramilitary agencies are springing up, instead of us to pray for our leaders, we are cursing them, instead of condemning corruption, we are celebrating them, instead of educating our children, we are sending them out to hawk on the streets, instead of our young ladies to dress, they are undressing in the name of fashion. Everything is just turning up side down.
19. Oga Leader, even parents and we the youth have our own faults. Parents are charging exorbitant fees as bride price, and the girls are getting older and giving birth in their fathers' houses. Boys are now getting married thinking they are men, forgetting that marriage is about maturity and not about age. Mothers are pushing their daughters to flirt with celebrities, to get pregnant for them, and to force them into marriage. That's why the likes of Peter of Psquare, and their oga at the top, 2face all have children out of wedlock.
20. Once upon a time in Nigeria, bankers were held in very high esteem, but these days bankers cannot dare to do shakara because they can be sacked at any time and their employers will blame it on government's economic policies.
21. Leader oh Leader, we cannot do without you and you cannot do without us. We are partners in this project. Give us the basic necessities of life and we will continue to support and pray for you as the Holy Book has instructed us to do.
22. My dear Government, give us light, good roads, transparent elections, equal opportunities, adequate security, force the reduction of bride price, ensure that bail is free in police stations, punish whoever tries to bribe a policeman, soldier or public official. Make it illegal for people to decamp from PDP to APC and then from APC to PDP again and again, be very careful about people you give national awards to, pay your workers reasonable minimum wage, pay your policemen and soldiers well so that they won't be tempted to demand bribe.
23. Mr. President, tell your State Governors to look inward and generate more revenue from their domains instead of depending heavily on Federal Allocations, screen your Ministerial candidates properly to avoid appointing political jobbers as Ministers.
24. Mr. Governor, when you are contesting for office, choose your friend as your running mate to avoid fighting with him in future. Appoint Commissioners based on merit instead of doing political compensation. Don't appoint too many Special Advisers and other aides, they will just swell your wage bill without any productivity. Take care of your residents and civil servants and don't tell people to ''Go and die''. And it is not necessary for you to contest for Senate after your 8 years. Also, avoid forcing your candidate on the people when your tenures elapse. Let the people choose their own leader. Let Godfatherism die a natural death.
25. Mr. Senator, Legislator, Honorable, or who ma sef, election is not a do or die affair. Stop switching the peoples' loyalty from their Governor to yourself. Make laws that will benefit your people instead of sitting in the National Assembly to shout aye and nay without knowing the facts of the matter. Your sitting allowance is not just for sitting, it is for meaningful contributions.
26. Mr. Local Government Chairman and Mr. Councillor, use the money allocated to you to better the living conditions of the people in your locality. It is not compulsory for you to marry more wives or acquire more concubines, or buy more houses and cars with the people's money.
27. My dear fellow youths, make hay while the sun still shines. Marry a friend and stop looking for a designer wife or husband. Work hard now that you are still young and still have abundant energy. Stop yahoo yahoo. Stop praying for your father to die so that you can claim the inheritance. Struggle for your own. Ladies, dress decently and stop making married men to break their wedding vows. Stop carrying plots of land on your head in the name of Brazilian hair, you will break your neck, use that money to start a business. Guys, if any sugar mummy toasts you, tell her that you respect your mother and won't sleep with her mate. Young ladies stop this longer throat and accept what your boyfriend can afford instead of sleeping with your father's secondary school principals because they have nothing but a few coins to lose, but you can lose your pride, your virginity, and even your life.
28. I know my letter is not up to 18 pages as is the standard, but I just had to get this off my mind. He who has eyes, let him read and do.
29. Long live the Federal Republic of Nigeria and long live the Nigerian Youth.
Signed
David King